Concealed Sorrow

by Theory Hazit & Toni Shift

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2 track single for "Concealed Sorrow". Watch the music video at www.youtube.com/illectrecordings debuting Tuesday August 2nd.

Full release purchase includes digital booklet.

Please click the song title to read what the song is about. Lyrics are posted as well.

credits

released 02 August 2011

Get more information on these artists at www.illect.com, www.facebook.com/illect, www.twitter.com/illect and www.youtube.com/illectrecordings

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Track Name: Concealed Sorrow (album version)
Things ain't been the same since mom passed away.
I just wanna go away.
I just wanna go...

Verse 1:

The name's Nicolas. Named after my dad
But I get ridiculed and called names like "fag" and "homo"
My real friends call me Nicky
I'm an only child born in the Twin City
Living with my biological pops isn't pretty
He agrees with the bullies at the school out to get me
It's cool though..one day I'll run and hide
And never to return to the place I reside
Until then, I have to settle with a disguise
Hiding who I really am from my father's eyes
Sexually confused is what "they" label me, telling me
All types of diseases from "A to Z" are deadly
And playing these medleys over and over
Singing the same washed up song trying to go sober
Deep in the shadows I search for some type of deity
And escape to a place where there's a freer me.

Chorus:

I just close my eyes and pray to God
Wishing away fear 'cuz life so hard
And I'm tired of being told of what I don't need
But the question is: who 'you really want me to be?
So I keep on faking, I keep on crying
I keep on cutting, I keep on dying
I keep on faking, I keep on crying
But I hear a voice saying keep on

Verse 2:

Now back to bullies. They hope and wish they could be gangsta.
This burden's like an anchor
Roasting me at lunch time, having a fun time
Kicking gay jokes and all until the sunrise
"funny ain't it...you feel better"
I say with a smirk as I'm putting on my sweater
I walk by and one sticks his foot out to trip me
It clipped me. I fell so hard it made my lip bleed
They grabbed my ankles and dragged to the restroom
Emptied out my bookbag yelling out "eff you"
"welcome to your funeral" smacked me with minerals
That come from an old corroded, out of order urinal
Stripped me naked, they were foul and onry
Forced me in a corner and began pissing on me
Spit on me then left, I know Jesus wept
I stayed in the corner balling, all I see is death

Chorus

Verse 3:

I came home that night with my head hanging low
And just today, depression's like 8 and 0
My dad asked: 'how was your day?'
Same ol same ol, but I'm all right. He's like "way to go!"
Went to the bathroom and turned on the shower
Locked the door and silently cried for hours
Laying on the floor, staring at the ceiling
Trying to over come the scariest feeling
My dad leaves the house, slamming the door
I felt the tremble laying on the bathroom floor
I get up and move to the hallway, pacing
I stop and gaze at the stairs by the basement
Grabbed my belt then I headed down stairs
Tied the belt to the rail then I unfolded the chair
Stepped up no fear, belt around my neck
I changed my mind, tried to get down but then I slipped
Track Name: Concealed Sorrow Remix (video version)
Things ain't been the same since mom passed away.
I just wanna go away.
I just wanna go...

Verse 1:

The name's Nicolas. Named after my dad
But I get ridiculed and called names like "fag" and "homo"
My real friends call me Nicky
I'm an only child born in the Twin City
Living with my biological pops isn't pretty
He agrees with the bullies at the school out to get me
It's cool though..one day I'll run and hide
And never to return to the place I reside
Until then, I have to settle with a disguise
Hiding who I really am from my father's eyes
Sexually confused is what "they" label me, telling me
All types of diseases from "A to Z" are deadly
And playing these medleys over and over
Singing the same washed up song trying to go sober
Deep in the shadows I search for some type of deity
And escape to a place where there's a freer me.

Chorus:

I just close my eyes and pray to God
Wishing away fear 'cuz life so hard
And I'm tired of being told of what I don't need
But the question is: who 'you really want me to be?
So I keep on faking, I keep on crying
I keep on cutting, I keep on dying
I keep on faking, I keep on crying
But I hear a voice saying keep on

Verse 2:

Now back to bullies. They hope and wish they could be gangsta.
This burden's like an anchor
Roasting me at lunch time, having a fun time
Kicking gay jokes and all until the sunrise
"funny ain't it...you feel better"
I say with a smirk as I'm putting on my sweater
I walk by and one sticks his foot out to trip me
It clipped me. I fell so hard it made my lip bleed
They grabbed my ankles and dragged to the restroom
Emptied out my bookbag yelling out "eff you"
"welcome to your funeral" smacked me with minerals
That come from an old corroded, out of order urinal
Stripped me naked, they were foul and onry
Forced me in a corner and began pissing on me
Spit on me then left, I know Jesus wept
I stayed in the corner balling, all I see is death

Chorus

Verse 3:

I came home that night with my head hanging low
And just today, depression's like 8 and 0
My dad asked: 'how was your day?'
Same ol same ol, but I'm all right. He's like "way to go!"
Went to the bathroom and turned on the shower
Locked the door and silently cried for hours
Laying on the floor, staring at the ceiling
Trying to over come the scariest feeling
My dad leaves the house, slamming the door
I felt the tremble laying on the bathroom floor
I get up and move to the hallway, pacing
I stop and gaze at the stairs by the basement
Grabbed my belt then I headed down stairs
Tied the belt to the rail then I unfolded the chair
Stepped up no fear, belt around my neck
I changed my mind, tried to get down but then I slipped